the day started out as any other I went to school, then out of the blue the lights flickered than died "its probably just a power cut" said my teacher assuring us then we heard the tsunami bells ring. everybody went into a panic I tried to open the door but it had been jammed shut, the teacher left us!
I grabbed a chair without thinking and smashed the window open I got out and saw a huge wave hurtling toward us I ran without thinking I looked back i saw kids screaming as it hit the school "Ahh!" I whaled running, I looked back once more "Arghh!" I screamed as it swallowed me into the depths I swam to the surface but the water pined me down I passed out...
When I woke I was floating on a plank of wood "urgh" I went coughing out water I was so filled with adrenaline that I didn't even realise the pain I was in "Ahh!" I screamed in agony my leg was broken. I tried to navigate were I was but failed I looked around and saw a cat stranded on a door I tried to swim over to it but I was in to much pain I looked around and saw a small wood beam I grabbed it and used it as paddle I grabbed the cat it was ginger with a collar saying "Daisy" I pet it not really knowing why maybe just for comfort I soon drifted into a deep sleep.. when i woke the water had all dried up meaning i had probably been asleep for a few days i looked around daisy had found a dead mouse. I heard footsteps I was in some sort of camp a doctor found me and fixed my leg then I met up with my family sadly not all of them had survived we had to stay at the camp for a while when our house was being built but a least we were safe...
I grabbed a chair without thinking and smashed the window open I got out and saw a huge wave hurtling toward us I ran without thinking I looked back i saw kids screaming as it hit the school "Ahh!" I whaled running, I looked back once more "Arghh!" I screamed as it swallowed me into the depths I swam to the surface but the water pined me down I passed out...
When I woke I was floating on a plank of wood "urgh" I went coughing out water I was so filled with adrenaline that I didn't even realise the pain I was in "Ahh!" I screamed in agony my leg was broken. I tried to navigate were I was but failed I looked around and saw a cat stranded on a door I tried to swim over to it but I was in to much pain I looked around and saw a small wood beam I grabbed it and used it as paddle I grabbed the cat it was ginger with a collar saying "Daisy" I pet it not really knowing why maybe just for comfort I soon drifted into a deep sleep.. when i woke the water had all dried up meaning i had probably been asleep for a few days i looked around daisy had found a dead mouse. I heard footsteps I was in some sort of camp a doctor found me and fixed my leg then I met up with my family sadly not all of them had survived we had to stay at the camp for a while when our house was being built but a least we were safe...
I really loved how you started your story and how it was based at school, i thought it was really good but i do think you could add a bit more, but that's my opinion.
ReplyDeletebut i did think it was awesome!